Posted by: Steph | January 18, 2010

Asthetic Baby Theory – The four types of babies:

Have you heard? All babies can be placed into one of the following four categories:

1. Piglet: You know the type, extra chubby cheeks and slightly upturned nose. Cute and often quite smiley. Think Shiloh Jolie-Pitt.

2. Catalogue: Exactly what it sounds like. The pretty babies that belong in a fashion spread. Whatever.

3. Under the Sea: This sounds bad, but it actually isn’t. This applies to the really funny looking babies. The ones with extra big googly eyes or a lot of “character”. Remember what the Olsen twins looked like when they were tiny? A little odd? Exactly. When I see one of these babies I can’t help but mutter “LOOK LOOK, UNDER THE SEA at three o’clock” to whoever I am with. And then I have to explain. Which sometimes gets me in trouble. But seriously, the Under the Sea genre is probably my favourite, and I always imagine them thinking sophisticated thoughts.

4. Potato: This is the one kind you wan to avoid creating. You know those babies whose hair matches their skin tone with dull coloured eyes? The boring looking babies that you think should be cute, but you just don’t really feel it. The good news is that you can camouflage a Potato. With the right bright outfits and a shiny personality, it is easy for a potato to be mistaken for one of the other types of babies.

Extra information: It should also be noted that these labels do not necessarily apply past the first year, and babies can jump from one genre to another within that first year. I challenge you to find a baby who does not fit into one of these buckets.


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